Time is Ever Fleeting

Life is short & time is ever fleeting. I want to get to the end of my life knowing that I lived and not just merely existed. I want to be able to tell the younger generations what the world was like back in my day. Living life without regret but evermore to be desired. Because our experience is the only thing that cannot be taken away from us. Our experience is also the only thing that is ours & ours alone. We are special because we are our own experience. It has molded us into the person we are, no two of us are alike. (take that snowflakes)

Claire from the future: June 2, 2021

I recently watched a video with a girl that said “When we die our loved ones at our funeral are not going to think about our hair, our height, our weight, or the texture of our skin. They are going to think about our patience, kindness, wisdom, and grace. They will think of the memories that they had with us and not what we were wearing. They will remember our smile and our laugh.” Life is about the time we spend with people, not the money we spend on our looks. Time is the only thing we have a finite amount of. You can never get more of it so spend your time being the best you, you can be.

This is what we need to remember every day as we choose our actions.

Daring to be Creative

I consider myself creative and talented. But I do not consider myself confident. Now every once in a while, if I have a friend by my side, I have a burst of confidence. I have the ability to be confident for other people but not for myself.

As a child, I would say I was born with confidence, most people probably are born with confidence. The reason I am so sure is because I have proof of either my weirdness before I contained it or my confidence shining through before I lost it.  

Me and my weird self proudly in the front row.

I remember as a child I would purposefully pose for photos. I would even pose candid photos. My mother prides herself on catching “candid” shots, but there are quite a few times I remember posing when she was trying to snap a photo:

I knew my good side and wanted it photographed.

In first grade, I remember being confident and full of creativity. Creative writing was my favorite thing to do in class. I could not transcribe my thoughts fast enough. I would get cramps from writing so quickly. Having that type of creativity flow from a brain was and is inspiring. The only other time in my life I remember having that type of flow is when I would have a surplus of emotion. Writing was my way of releasing that emotion and processing it fully.

In my years of school, I realized that when forced to be creative I produce lackluster work. I found myself crippled with the fear of not being as good as everyone else. My classmates would never see my work, and I never saw my classmates work. The fear of not matching up to them was not backed by anything but my feeling of not being as talented. I stopped myself from being my best by the fear of not being my best. How messed up is that?

Now that I have been out of school a year struggling to find a job. I have learned (at least it feels like it) that I can’t base my confidence on everyone else, it has to come from me. I am still not super confident, but I am confident enough to create. I posted this blog. I have posted some art and plan to post more. Being constantly inspired by the world around me is euphoric. It is incredible what a little confidence can do for a creative. If you are stuck in a rut creatively try to build your confidence. Listen to some bumping jams and go on a search for kindergarten confidence.